That One Hot Day In Kutztown

8 Apr

Jeez its hot.  I almost forgot that summer actually happens and warm weather is a thing that actually exists in things that are not my memory.  This year at Kutztown has been a bit rough if you are a fan of not being freezing.  For a bit I thought President Cevallos actually cut nice days from the budget.  But alas, its here.  The day where you can break out your “SUNS OUT, GUNZ OUT” shirt and dress like every person that has ever attended a Macklemore concert.

That first really warm day is a real slap in the face.  You wake up in the morning and go “WHOA, THIS IS NICE” and you notice half of the school has already taken pictures of the Clock Tower on Instagram.  Kutztown still doesn’t put the fountains on which is a travesty that can only be blamed on the sequester but you make do.  Then all of a sudden you leave your first class and its legitimately hot.  Like your back gets that sweat because you are carrying a backpack.

But when its hot people lose it.  They come out of Deatrick, Dixon, South Dining Hall like Harry Potter did when he was first allowed out of the cupboard.  “What is this great orb in the sky that bringeth the heat?  I must celebrate this”…now I see why the Aztecs, Greeks and all celebrated the sun.  Imagine what it was like to not have a ten-day forecast and all of a sudden its snowing and then BOOM, you are sweating.  That had to be mindblowing before they were conquered.  Totally can buy into that.

Still, the 200 foot piece of grass that Kutztown gives us called the DMZ becomes Malibu.  Girls just wear push-up bras as they suntan (while some fellas are likely furiously staring at them from a third floor window….like we did our freshman year) and the bros take a moment to not go to GNC and toss some ball to show off their lack of athletic prowess.  “YAY BRAH, WIFFLEBALL WHEYPROTEIN TANKTOPS”.

But seriously there is nothing better than that first warm day.  Even the pale kids such as myself strut around as we are fully aware that people are going “dude, how can someone’s elbows be so pale?” as we get sunburnt walking from Golden Bear to Lytle.  Even that one creepy kid who patrols the south side of campus decides that today is a good day to just chill out and not terrify half the school.

Yet we always get screwed because only Mondays to Wednesdays are hot.  For some reason, the warm weather decides that weekends are their time off as well and we’ll get the wind and rain that spring is famous for.  Note, the coldest days every weekend are Sundays to Wednesdays where you can’t really enjoy it.



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